Chapter 9 - pages 204-205
What I had a severe disagreement with in 2012, was that sexuality had become the dominant cultural attribute that women have in the world in order to live their life and to achieve what they want. This very much is the result of media influence and the resultant obsession with female appearance as the defining characteristic of a woman’s value. This to me was abhorrent. Too many girls were content with just being recognized for being attractive or sexual, and used this as their sole criteria for their position in the world. Before continuing, let me take a moment to point out that I am not above admiring a beautiful woman and I ended up marrying one of the most beautiful, but in Natalie’s case, there was an abundance of other attributes that affirmed the original attraction and the fact that we were in love was predicated on many other aspects of her talent, intelligence, character and personality.
I distinctly remember that I was at a coffee shop in Seattle back around 2002, and there was a magazine rack. While I waiting for my coffee, I was looking at the magazine covers and I noticed one magazine specifically called “Complete Woman.” I smiled to myself as I read the content headlines on the cover of the magazine. They comprised two articles on satisfying their men in bed, two on hair and make-up tips, one on losing their winter weight and one on fashions for spring. I remember openly chuckling to myself that the magazine was called “Complete Woman.” Even Cosmopolitan magazine didn’t simplify women to this standard of being just attractive and a sexual object for men’s benefit. It turned out, however, that this was exactly what was happening and girls were being influenced into adopting this self-image.
I started asking myself what was behind all this at the time and I came to realize that it was the Mom’s who were encouraging this notion and allowing their daughters to focus on their female sexuality as the core of their femininity. This contention goes back to the notion I referred to earlier, as an entire generation of girls had been raised with the influence of Madonna in the 1980s and embraced the desire to be sexual.